


The missing part.

by cobblestyles



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Did I Mention Fluff, Fluff, Happy Ending, M/M, Swearing, dan swears a lot so beware of that, phil has a boyfriend but there's no cheating involved, so much fluff it should be illegal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-10
Updated: 2017-02-10
Packaged: 2018-09-23 07:34:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,645
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9646535
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cobblestyles/pseuds/cobblestyles
Summary: Phil Lester is a radio host and he has a boyfriend. But he's always felt like something was missing in his life. Maybe the new comic book store around the corner will help him find what it is.AKA the comic book store AU no one's asked for.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Hi guys!!! It's been so long since I wrote something. This is also my first attempt at writing RPS but aahhh I'm just so in love with Dan and Phil I had to do something about it. I hope you enjoy this sugary sweet.
> 
> ETA: I don't have a beta for this bc I don't know anyone who would want to read this SO if there are any mistakes I'm really sorry (English is not my first language).

 

Phil looked at his watch for the fifth time in the last five minutes. Carl was late. Phil shouldn’t even be surprised. His boyfriend was known for being late, it was fine. But tonight was also their anniversary, and he stupidly thought Carl would deem it special. Couples went in and out of the fancy restaurant Phil had picked out months prior to this, looking happy and satisfied, dripping with love. Phil sighed, trying not to let it sting too hard. It’s been two years. Two years of hard work but also lots of fun. Two years and Phil still didn’t know if he was in love. Carl told him he loved him constantly, but for some reason it felt flat to his ears, like Carl didn’t believe it. His friends had asked him why he was even staying with the guy, but he wasn’t unhappy, and he hated breaking up. He was about to give up when he spotted Carl running toward him, an apologetic look on his face. _This_ is why Phil is fighting.

So Carl forgot about the anniversary thing. So what? They still had a good time, went back to Carl’s place and watched a movie. Phil didn’t feel like being intimate so they just went to bed, Phil feeling empty and a little sad. He’s been feeling empty for years, trying desperately to fill the void in his heart, as if a part of him was missing. It was ridiculous, and his friends often called him daft, but Phil couldn’t shake the feeling. He would be 30 soon, and his failed relationships were wearing him down. Maybe love wasn’t the answer. He scoffed, because anyone who knew Phil knew he was in love with love. How he craved intimacy, being able to spoil the person he loves, spending all of his time with them and never get tired of it, bickering like an old married couple but ending up tangled in bed, sweaty and _satisfied_. He’s never had that. He looked to his left but Carl had already left for work, not even leaving a little note to wish him a good day. Or apologizing. He got up, got dressed and left as quickly as he could.

He lived in a small crappy flat in London but it was home, and he needed to collect his thoughts. Was he crazy to believe he deserved better? Carl wasn’t the greatest boyfriend in the world, but he was patient and put up with Phil calmly. Maybe that’s why Phil felt so on edge all the time. He himself was a very optimistic and happy person. He smiled pretty much all the time, laughed easily and got along with most people. He was easy going. Carl was like that, too. So why was he driving Phil crazy? He dismissed the question, determined to forget about last night, and enjoy his day off. Working at the BBC sure had its perks, and he spent his money on unnecessary items rather than buying a better place. He liked his home, it was cosy, and moving out of Manchester had already been tedious enough, so he wasn’t in a hurry to move _again_ . He checked his emails, adjusting his glasses and trying to fix his fringe at the same time. He almost lost balance on his chair, and laughed to himself. His clumsiness wasn’t that endearing to Carl, and his smile faded, unhappy thoughts clouding his mind. _No_. He said he’d forget about it. Maybe he should just try harder. Carl was nice, Phil was just being a little difficult. He rolled his shoulders, typing answers and agreeing to come to some meetings, until his stomach made itself aware. He groaned, too lazy to cook himself anything, and regretting not having at least a box of cereals.

Two hours and chinese takeout later, Carl had called to apologize and promised he’d make it up to Phil when his schedule cleared out. Phil grinned, and he was glad Carl couldn’t see him, seeing how fake it was. Starting to get bored out of his mind, Phil decided to check out the new comic book store around the corner. He’d meant to check it weeks ago, but he never found the time. Carl wasn’t a nerd like he was, so Phil kept this part of himself a secret. He figured that maybe it wasn’t normal, to hide something so insignificant in the grand scheme of things from your partner, but he shrugged it off, as usual. The air was chilly, and he was glad the shop was not even a five minutes walk from his flat. He spotted a guy at the register, long blonde hair tied in a bun, and obviously flirting with the young woman buying a _Wonder Woman_ comic. The guy still waved enthusiastically at him, and Phil instantly felt ten times better. He waved back, smiling wide, watching as the girl pushed a strand of hair behind her ear. Blonde guy was winning. Phil looked around, impressed with how everything was already so tidy, despite the store being quite new. There was a nice atmosphere to the place, like whoever decorated tried to make it as welcoming as possible. It smelled really good, too, and Phil noticed a fair amount of candles had been placed on shelves with toys and action figures, and even some _Funko Pops_. Oh, Phil loved those! His eye caught a Pikachu one and he suppressed a squeak as he raced to take a closer look. He saw kids lounging in the “reading room”, with sofas and a couple of chairs and even more candles, and Phil smiled. He loved this place. He picked up the Pikachu pop, feeling like a child holding a present, and managed to knock down all the other ones with it. He winced, the kids barely glancing up. Right, of course. This wasn’t a rare occurrence in Phil’s life.

“I know it says ‘Gotta catch them all’, but I think you may have exaggerated a bit here, mate." 

That was a lovely, lovely voice, laced with mirth and something else entirely. Phil turned around, muttering a “Sorry” and was faced with an equally lovely, lovely face. No, scratch that. The most beautiful boy Phil’s ever seen. He swallowed, and the boy sighed, picking up the fallen Pikachus. Phil watched, mesmerized, until his brain screamed at him to help, and he hastily picked up the last ones, feeling a blush creeping up on his cheeks.

“You didn’t have to do that” Phil said, embarrassed. What was wrong with him?

“I kind of did though”

At Phil’s confused expression, the boy added, “I work here” and Phil nodded, wanting to slap himself in the face at the same time.

“Right, sorry again” he laughed a little, “I want to say I’m usually not that clumsy but alas, that’s just my everyday struggle. I saw Pikachu and I just had to hold it.” 

The boy stayed silent for a moment, staring at Phil with an intensity that made him want to bolt, until a smile made its way on his face and oh. _Oh_ . Dimples. This boy had _dimples_. 

“Oh my God, I don’t know what’s more tragic. The fact that this happens to you on a daily basis, or that you used the word ‘alas’. What are you, 80?” 

Phil laughed for real this time. “You’d be surprised. Maybe I’m a time traveller. Or maybe I’ve discovered the fountain of youth.”

“Or maybe you’re just a weirdo”, but his tone was kind, and Phil felt something open up inside of him. It was like a switch had been turned on, like his soul was vibrating. 

“I’m Phil, by the way.” 

“I didn’t ask, but nice to meet you Phil. I’m Dan, and as I’ve stated before, I work here. I’m the wiz behind all this” and he gestured all around him, in a I- don’t- really- care- kind of way. “May I help you with anything? Or are you planning on destroying my hard work?”

Phil felt breathless. Dan was snarky and sarcastic, dimples at full play, eyes dancing with promises of never ending fun, and something else that Phil couldn’t quite place. He plastered on his best smile, and Dan raised his eyebrows, unimpressed. 

“That was my original plan, yes, but I wouldn’t want to put a sad expression on your face. I mean look at you..” he stuttered, suddenly realising what he’d just said, “I mean… You’re cute. No! Oh my God, do you have like a hiding place or something? So I can die in peace?”

Dan was _laughing_ . Figure his laugh was as beautiful as the rest of him. But there was also a blush on his cheeks, and Phil had the sudden urge to kiss him. He didn’t. That’d be weird. And wrong. He had a _boyfriend_. 

“Alright, cool it. Do you not want that Pikachu, then? Cause, as interesting as you are, Phil, I do have to pretend that I enjoy talking to customers.” 

Phil always thought that it was horribly cliché in movies, the idea that your name could sound so good and meaningful from someone else. Someone you’d love, for instance. But Dan saying his name sent butterflies in his belly and he felt like his heart was trying to crawl out of his chest.

“I’ll just take this one then. Carefully.”

Dan chuckled and grabbed it for him, guiding him to the register, where blonde hair guy was twiddling with his phone. He probably got that girl’s number.

“Oi, Danny, you got ourselves a new customer? Wicked!” 

Phil snickered at the nickname and Dan glared at him, as if daring him to say something. He obviously hated it.

“Yup, all by myself and all. You could say I’m improving. Although I should warn you, this guy’s a menace.” 

Phil elbowed him. “Hey! But, kinda true.”

Blonde hair guy laughed good naturedly, and Phil paid his Pikachu with the ten quid he miraculously had in his pocket, having no excuse to stay any longer. He looked at Dan who was already looking at him with that glint in his eyes and those damn dimples, and Phil _wanted_. In a way he hasn’t wanted in a long, long time. He felt his phone vibrate in his pocket and was suddenly reminded that he had a special someone in his life, and he felt so ashamed, like he was cheating on him. He went to the door, waving goodbye to blonde hair guy, who shouted “I’m Steve!”, and turned around one last time, only to find himself face to face with Dan.

“Woah mate, that was a close one, uh?” but he sounded nervous, fiddling with the hem of his shirt. Phil was so endeared. 

“Yes, I’m even a menace to you.”

Dan looked up at him, and there was a vulnerability there that made Phil want to hold Dan for eternity. 

“I guess I’ll see you around?” Dan said, trying to laugh it off.

“I’ll come back!” Phil blurted, and Dan actually took a step back, startled. “I live right around the corner so… Prepare to see me a lot.”

Dan smiled, so genuine and lovely that Phil felt it all over. “I’ll be ready, don’t sweat it. Now leave, it’s starting to get uncomfortable. Shoo, go!” 

He pushed Phil until he was out the door and back in the chilly air, but he didn’t feel it. He was so warm. He grinned at Dan and shook his hand, Dan obviously taken aback, and went home. Once in the security of his flat, he closed his eyes and swore that he still felt Dan’s hand in his.

 

*

So, alright. Phil had been patient. He waited a good week before going back to the store. He was shaking with excitement, unable to stop thinking about Dan. There was a connection there, and maybe they could be the best of friends. A friend that he was attracted to, but that was a detail. He could live with that. He saw Dan at the counter, staring into space, like he was fighting to stay awake. Phil took a deep breath. Dan looked _good_. He was wearing all black again, probably his signature look, tight jeans that made his thighs look incredible, and a black shirt with stars on them. Dan was the galaxy.

“Hello Danny boy, fancy seeing you here.” 

Dan glanced at him, a murderous look in his eyes, and Phil stifled a giggle.

“Don’t ever call me Danny boy, fuck. You know what, _Philip_? You’re banned from my store. Get out.” 

His tone was completely serious but Phil could tell he was fighting a smile. God, he missed him. 

“Banished? Oh my, such serious words. Think you scare me?” 

Dan straightened up. He was taller than Phil. “I think I could, yeah. But I’m not wasting my time with this. Did you want something?”

_You_ , Phil wants to say, but he shuts his mouth. Carl had noticed Phil was a little off, and thus tried to make it up to him by buying him flowers and making him a nice dinner. Phil was so out of it that he couldn’t even appreciate the gesture. He was probably a horrible person, but seeing Dan again made him forget about the rest of the world. 

“Maybe I just wanted to see you again.”

Dan blushed, dropping his cool facade. “Did you?”

He sounded so small, and Phil was intrigued. Who was Dan? Granted, they just met, but there was something about him, something sad and guarded, like he was trying so hard to be someone else. 

“Yeah” Phil couldn’t help it. Dan’s face lights up, and it’s definitely worth it. “But also, I noticed you had some video games? Which is kind of surprising in that kind of store, but I love it.”

Dan grinned, and Phil focused on his dimples, and how he could probably fit a finger in them. He really wanted to poke Dan’s cheeks.

“We do have some games! Let me show you around, come on.”

Phil followed without question. He’d probably follow him to the ends of the earth, so. Most of the games were based on cartoons and superheroes, so Phil instantly grabbed Mario Kart, because that’s who Phil Lester is. Dan eyed him, and smirked. 

“Did you know that I am a Mario Kart champion? I could probably beat your sorry ass.” 

Phil cackled, because Dan was so unexpected.

“Such confidence for a _child_.” 

Dan pouted and Phil regretted it because, well. Dan was too cute for him to handle.

“Or maybe you’re right!” he added quickly, feeling guilty somehow. Dan laughed, doubling over in the process. 

“Fuck me, you’re too nice. I bet if I stepped on your feet you’d be the one to apologize. Oh, Phil, you’re something else.” 

Phil stood there frozen while Dan went back to the counter when he spotted a few customers, Mario Kart in hand, Dan’s words playing endlessly in his head. So, Dan had a potty mouth. That he noticed instantly. But hearing Dan say ‘fuck me’ in such a casual way still sent shivers down his spine. And other places. He went to the counter on automatic, Dan looking at him expectantly, hands raised toward him.

“Cash or credit card?” 

“Do I look like I carry cash in my pockets? Card, please.”

Dan smirked again, and Phil was on edge. He waited for the confirmation to enter his code, but the silence was deafening. He looked up, and was surprised to see Dan staring at the credit card, mouth open in awe. 

“What’s wrong?” Phil asked, and Dan seemed to shake himself out of his shock, and when he looked at him again, Phil saw stars in his eyes.

“Your name… Lester. You’re Phil Lester?! Holy shit!”

“Yes? That is my name.” 

Dan was bouncing on his feet. _Adorable_. He rounded the counter to face Phil, his energy palpable.

“Phil Lester from the radio, right? I knew your voice sounded familiar!” 

Phil was speechless. He was sure he was gaping at Dan, but that was honestly the last thing he expected. Dan listened to _him_. And by the looks of it, he was a fan. Phil wasn’t the type of person who wanted praise at all times, but having someone as fascinating as Dan looking at him like that? It made him swell with pride. 

“Guilty” he finally said, and Dan clapped his hands.

“Oh shit! I’m just so… I listen to you _all the time_! I can’t believe I’m meeting you here of all places! How’s my hair?”

Dan actually tried to find some kind of reflection and Phil had to laugh because, come on. Dan was beautiful, he didn’t have to worry. 

“Your hair looks fine, Dan. It’s nice to meet a fan.”

He pretended to inspect his nails and Dan scoffed.

“Look at you, puffing up your chest, metaphorically. This is not a good look on you, Lester. I guess it’s true what they say: never meet your heroes.” 

Phil shoved him, Dan’s laughter bouncing in his heart. “You’re ridiculous… what’s your last name?”

“Howell, and please. Are you going to use this as well? Aren’t you supposed to be creative? I’m so disappointed, Phil. You know what? Mario Kart is on the house. You said you lived close by, right?”

Phil nodded, unsure where Dan was going with this. His smirk was back in full force, the picture of a man with a plan.

“Well, why don’t I come by after my shift and annihilate you?” 

Phil thought about it. Having Dan in his flat, alone? Very, very dangerous. And tempting. He had to say yes. 

“Show me what you got, Howell. I’m ready.”

Dan punched the air, triumphant. “A Dan vs Phil showdown!”

* 

So that’s how Dan found himself in Phil’s flat most of the time. After Dan crushed him at Mario Kart (and his raucous laugh was enough for Phil to gladly accept his win), they made it a tradition to play more games together. They kept score, and Phil was having so much fun that he forgot about his plans with Carl. He had mentioned having a boyfriend to Dan, and tried to ignore the small disappointment on his face, until Dan had cleared his throat and resumed the game. Phil was so screwed. 

Getting to know Dan only made Phil fall harder. He started noticing the dark look he’d sometimes get, how he secluded himself in his own mind, sometimes not texting Phil for days. But he would always come back as if nothing was wrong, mumbling things about ‘existential crisis’ and ‘impending doom’ and Phil would just chuckle, rubbing circles on Dan’s back. That was also new, the little touches. Dan wasn’t the most affectionate person - his own words - but he let Phil grab his hand or his arm, reciprocating by poking Phil repeatedly. One month and Phil felt like they’ve known each other for years, moving around each other with ease. It was only a matter of time before everything went to hell. 

“Are you seeing someone else?” 

Phil dropped his fork, splashing some bolognese sauce on his shirt, and looked at Carl, at a loss for words. Carl just stared at him, unreadable. 

“No!” Phil spluttered, and technically it was true. He wasn’t _seeing_ Dan, he was hanging out with him. Constantly. He even brought him to the station, something he’s never done with Carl. It didn’t mean anything. _Lies_ , Phil’s treacherous brain supplied. Carl squinted, obviously not buying it. 

“Phil, despite what you think, I know you. You’ve been distant since our anniversary. Are you still punishing me? Sometimes you get that dreamy look in your eyes, and you think I don’t see it, but I do. So, again, are you seeing someone else?” 

Phil reminded himself to breathe. “I’m not seeing anyone. I just…” _made a new friend_ , “I’m sorry. I guess I get lost in my thoughts sometimes.” 

He chuckled, hoping Carl would drop it and maybe be the one to end this nightmare of a relationship, because no way was he happy with their situation, but he just sighed, dabbing at his mouth with his napkin. 

“I know. Alright then, I believe you. Let’s just finish dinner.” 

In insight, Phil should have ended it right here. Carl gave him the opportunity. What they were doing wasn’t probably healthy. Instead, he was soon to make another, equally life changing decision. 

*

Dan was living with Steve, and even though Steve was one of the nicest people in the world, Phil knew he drove Dan crazy. He also had many hook ups, which meant Dan had to deal with people even outside of work, and _that would not do_. So Phil, being the idiot that he is, came up with a solution. 

“You should move in with me.” 

Dan choked on his tea. “Excuse me?!” 

“Move in. Here. With me.” 

A pause. “Are you fucking kidding me?” 

Phil shook his head. His brain was yelling at him to let go, to not do this, _bad idea bad idea bad idea_. Dan stared at him, brain going a mile a minute, and Phil waited. He would always wait for Dan. 

“You’re serious.” 

That wasn’t a question. Phil shrugged, but his stomach was in knots, and his heart was beating hard against his chest.

“Why not? You’re pretty much here all the time, and I have a spare room. Occasional friends might visit but I promise there won’t be parties and you can stay in your room as long as you like. And you won’t have to worry about hook ups or anything.” 

Dan laughed, but then his smile faded a little and no, _no_. Dan wasn’t allowed to be sad, ever. 

“What about your boyfriend?” he mumbled, avoiding Phil’s eyes. 

“What? Oh! Oh, umm. It won’t be a problem, I’m sure.” 

Honestly, he hadn’t thought about that. What mattered was Dan, and Dan’s well being. Who cares if Carl disagreed? He didn’t even like going to Phil’s place anyway. Too far from work, he says. 

“Well that was convincing” Dan said with a lopsided smile. “Are you sure though? I’m not easy to live with. Ask my parents.” 

There was a self deprecating laugh, and Phil just went with his instincts and hugged Dan as tight as he could. He’s been dying to hold him for a while now, and Dan went rigid for a few seconds until he completely melted in Phil’s arms, sighing contentedly. Phil breathed him in, he couldn’t help it, and Dan smelled of vanilla and something forbidden, like Dan was his and his only, that somehow he was the only one who got to see him so pliant. From what Dan had said about family and ‘friends’, he probably was. It tore at his heartstrings, how this boy came to be in his life, and how unthinkable it is to imagine a world without him in it. And that’s when it hit him. That void inside of him. He hasn’t felt it for weeks, able to sleep peacefully and wake up with a smile, his good mood bringing in more people to his segment on the radio. He even started a Youtube channel, doing live shows to answer questions. If he mentioned Dan two or three hundred times, no one had to know. He never mentioned him by name. 

“You’re a sappy sap, Lester. I can hear you thinking all the wonderful things you think about me.” 

Dan giggled, and Phil fell in love.

 

Living with Dan was _easy_. He did have his mood swings, and would sometimes snap at Phil when things got out of control, but then he’d make hot chocolate and cookies and cuddle with Phil, ignoring his ‘no touching’ policy. Phil hadn’t told Carl about this, knowing full well that he wouldn’t understand. So that’s probably why Carl decided to show up unannounced two months after Dan officially moved in, consequently freaking Phil out. Like he said, he was so screwed. 

“Carl! Well that’s a surprise!” 

Did he sound calm and natural? His voice was definitely higher than usual. Not good, then. Carl had a thin smile, and he walked in without waiting for an invitation. Phil wanted to _die_. It was as clear as day that someone else was living here, Dan’s jacket thrown on the couch, new furniture and countless video games and DVDs, Dan’s smell present everywhere. Carl wrinkled his nose and there was no way out. He then went to the kitchen where Dan was lazily licking a bowl of chocolate because they decided to bake cookies and film the experience, and upon seeing Carl promptly dropped the bowl. Carl turned to Phil, fuming. 

“Um, hi?” Dan said, trying desperately to put on a genuine smile, “you must be… Carl?” 

Carl turned on him, his hands on his hips, assessing Dan who seemed to shrink on himself. 

“And you must be… Actually I have no idea _who_ you are. Phil?” 

That was his cue, right. “Carl, this is Dan. My new flatmate”. A snicker from Carl. “And my best friend.” 

Dan glanced at him, wide eyed. He mouthed ‘best friend?, putting a hand on his heart. Phil nodded, because it was true. Dan had become his best friend, the one he could talk to without being tired of it, the one who gave comfort and made fun of him relentlessly but fondly, the one who understood him completely and actually laughed at his lame puns even though he’d deny it later, the one he… The one he _loved_ . He loved Dan. Irrevocably. He had tried to fight those feelings, he really did, but the crinkles by Dan’s eyes when he laughed made him think about the future, of innocent bickering and lying around in bed when the sun is out, of never having to worry about missing _something_ when Dan looked at him quizzically with those lovely brown eyes, of games and fun and play fights, of kissing and probably mind blowing sex. Phil gets hot just thinking about it, on how Dan’s skin would feel under his fingers, if he’s as soft as he thinks, the sounds he’d make, what would shatter him. 

“Your best friend, that you’ve never mentioned.” Carl says flatly, and Phil is brought back to the present, and he wonders, not for the first time, why he wasted two years of his life, why he didn’t meet Dan sooner, why they’re wasting time _now_. 

“Actually,” and Phil takes a deep breath. It’s time. “Carl, I’m sorry. This isn’t working. Us, I mean. And I think you know it’s not working but we’re still trying to save something that’s long been gone, and we make each other miserable.” 

Carl’s expression goes from angry to understanding, and Phil is grateful. That was apparently the push they both needed. Dan is scooping the broken pieces of the bowl, and Phil idly wonders if this is some kind of metaphor. Dan must sense Phil’s eyes on him because he looks up, tentatively grins, and yeah. 

“I should go.” Carl says, already walking to the door. Phil follows suit, leaving Dan in the kitchen. Carl sighs again, but there’s a tiny smile at the corner of his mouth. 

“You love him. I can see why, he’s gorgeous.” 

Phil blushes, and Carl laughs. “You were right. You _are_ right. We’re not happy. But we were, at some point, right? Anyway, I hope you’ll finally find what you’re looking for. Take care, Phil.”

He doesn’t wait for Phil to say anything else and relief washes through him, doors suddenly opening in front of him. It went way better than he expected, and he goes back to the kitchen with a happy strut, smiling from ear to ear. Dan had apparently given up on trying to fix the bowl and is now sitting on the counter, waiting for the cookies to be done. 

“You seem like a happy chap for someone who’s just ended a relationship.” Dan says when he spots Phil. 

“Who says we broke up?” 

Dan gasps, and Phil bites his lip because Dan is an open book when it comes to everything Phil, and the look of utter disappointment on his face is priceless. 

“But we did.” he adds, for good measure.

He doesn’t miss the way Dan’s face seems to light up, and Phil’s heart is telling him to just go for it so he does, positioning himself between Dan’s long legs, feeling Dan’s pulse under his fingers when he grabs his wrist and surges up to kiss him long and slow, wanting to savor it for years to come. Dan makes a soft noise so Phil kisses harder, Dan reciprocating just as hard, biting Phil’s lower lip when he deems it not satisfying enough. Phil gasps into his mouth, breaking apart to get some air. Dan is a _mess_ , lips red from kissing, dark eyes staring at him like Phil is also desirable and he feels drunk with love. So that’s what Beyoncé was singing about. Sort of. 

“I’ve been wanting to do that since that first day I met you” Phil admits, forehead resting on Dan’s.

“You should have” Dan whispers, and Phil shivers, wishing he could just fuse with Dan and be done with it. _Weird, Lester_ , and that’s Dan’s voice he hears in his head now, not just his own.

“Couldn’t. You know.” he vaguely gestures with his left hand, and Dan grabs it, lacing their fingers together.

“I never wanted to do that, with anyone,” Dan says, and he sounds shy all of a sudden, “but you make everything so easy. I’m not scared with you. You don’t think I’m fucked up, you push me to be better, to try new things. I’ve never had a best friend until I met you.” 

Phil wants to cry. He raises his head, stares right into Dan’s eyes.

“You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me. Don’t look down, you are! I always felt like there was something missing, and that day when I saw you… I just knew. You’re incredible, Dan. You don’t give yourself enough credit. The few videos we made, people love you. Imagine if they got to _live_ with you. I’m the lucky one. Carl never gave a damn about what I did, and I let it slide. But you? You’re so passionate about this! You inspire me to experiment new things and I think we should make a gaming channel! Make it an actual competition, Danny boy.” 

Dan groaned, and Phil suppressed a smile. “That was a fucking nice speech and then you ruined it, you spork.” 

Phil laughed, putting his arms around Dan’s neck and pecking his lips once, twice, three times, until Dan gave up the fight and kissed him back. 

“You can’t shut me up with a kiss every time!”

“Oh, I think I can. And I’m going to. All the time, because you never shut up.”

Dan shoved him then pulled him back, muttering ‘I hate you’ before kissing him again. 

* 

“I’m stupidly in love with you.” 

Dan jumped out of his skin, squeaking and disregarding his controller to turn to Phil, who’s been watching him play Overwatch for the last hour. 

“My God, Phil! You do pick your moments, uh? Fuck, I almost had a heart attack!” 

Phil smiled around his cup of coffee, shrugging nonchalantly.

“Oops. But I’m still stupidly in love with you. Just thought you should know.”

“Stupidly is the right word. Ugh, Phil.” A pause. “I love you too. I guess.”

Phil scoffed. “You guess? You _guess_? You’re a little shit, Howell.”

Dan grinned at him and it was blinding. Screw those dimples. 

“I see you’ve taken after me at last, Mister I- Never- Swear. And fine, I don’t guess,” he air quoted the word, “I know. I fell for you when you knocked down all those poor Pikachus. You think I follow customers around all the time? Pshht, Phil. Come on.”

“So you saw me first?” Phil was seriously flabbergasted. “And you thought I was…” 

“Attractive. Interesting. Bluest eyes I’ve ever seen. Now stop making me say those things, I hate it.” 

He grabbed the controller again, but Phil flew at him, kissing him like his life depended on it. Dan actually _picked him up_ and Phil didn’t squeak, thank you very much, but all rational thoughts escaped him when Dan suggested he wanted to ride him. He even made _sex_ into a competition. Kinky bastard.

And the sex _was_ mind blowing. Phil peppered kisses all over Dan’s face, Dan trying to swap him away but too tired and boneless to succeed. He was marking his neck because he remembered Dan telling him how sensitive it was, and just breathing Dan in, his heart doubling in size somehow. He looked at the boy he loved, the natural curly hair tickling his nose, the warm brown eyes, his chapped lips, and he felt it, right inside of him. How his soul seemed to reconnect. Dan closed his eyes, letting sleep take over him so Phil held him tighter, covering them up with the blanket. The future looked bright for once, and he thanked whoever put Dan in his path. Maybe they were going too fast, sharing their space and their clothes, never leaving each other’s sides, connected at the hips, like his friends would say. But he doesn’t care as long as he gets to keep Dan for the rest of his life. 

“I love you so much,” he whispers into his skin, wanting Dan to believe him, and Dan rolled to his side, burying his head in Phil’s neck. 

“Shut up, you spork.”

  
Phil grinned. The missing part of him was a jerk. Figures.

**Author's Note:**

> honestly, that was the fluffiest fluff, right? But I think we all need a little fluff lately.


End file.
